Dark Black Women vs Light Skinned Black Women

As a teenager, I was subjected to the young dark black guys wanting to only date the light skin black or birachial girls. I love every nationally but I prefer my brothers. I'm in my thirty's now and still is faced with the same pain/insult as I did then. I'm an educated, personable, and loving black women. Why can't a dark skin man see that in me? I have friends (men) that always say "I love my black women, a coffee of beauty, and blackberry juice" but then turn around and disrepect me when in the clubs to talk to light skin sisters or go home to their light skin wives. Can someone help me understand what the problem is or a least shed some light to the situation?